Baby Blues
by LisaDouglas
Summary: Emily fights baby blues.


"Hi honey how was the party?" Bob asked sweetly, he was making dinner and Emily had just returned home from some kind of party. He wasn't even sure what.

"Oh Bob." She began; he was shocked when she started to cry.

"Emily what is wrong! Why are you crying like that?! Are you okay?" He hoped she hadn't wrecked the car or anything. He threw down what he'd been doing and rushed to her, taking her in his embrace immediately. He held her tightly and quickly tried to assess what was wrong, this was so…unlike her.  
"I'm okay. Yeah." She sniffled.

"Well what is it?"

"I don't know just…the party made me kind of sad that's all."

"I've never heard of…of a sad party honey you'll have to…"

"Well it was just the subject matter was a little sensitive for me…"

"Well it wasn't a funeral…was it? I mean you're wearing pink people don't tend to wear pink to…"

"No Bob it wasn't a funeral." She was upset but she had to laugh at this. It was funny. She broke away from him, patting his chest gratefully and began to set the table for the dinner he was in the middle of making.

"And it wasn't a wedding or a bridal shower was it…because you're married why would that make you upset?" He reasoned, going back in the kitchen.

"It was a baby shower Bob."

"Oh." He was kind of stunned.

She was going to bring this up, again? Emily put her head down wondering what the use was. She felt kind of embarrassed, or ashamed now, she didn't know which, for bringing it up. Like she wanted to runaway from him just because she admitted her feelings. Bob decided he owed her a serious talk. Not only was it the right thing to do, but he could feel his wife was really hurting and he hated that.

"And how did you uh." He cleared his throat. "How did you feel about that?"

"Well, it just…there were all these women there you know, with little baby hats and onesies and bottles...and I don't know what came over me Bob. I just…I suddenly really, really wanted one. And I realized I'm getting older…and if I don't do it soon it's going to be too late. And Bob…I don't know about you but…I don't want it to be too late before I realize this was something I really wanted…I mean, I know it's not something you want…but it's something I would love to do."

Actually she didn't really know what had happened. This was something they'd both wanted very much at one time, earlier in their marriage. She'd never been sure what had happened, other than her not getting pregnant and their not getting moved up on the adoption list…somewhere along the line he'd stopped wanting the family they'd always intended to start.

"I've gotta be totally honest with you Emily. Having a baby, being a Dad…it's just not for me."

Emily sighed and a single tear rolled down her cheek. If he wasn't going to hide his selfish (in her opinion) preference, she wasn't going to hide her pain that was for sure. She didn't think she could anyway.

"Emily…why do you want this?" He decided to ask her this rather than try to wipe the tear away, which was what he really wanted to do.

"I don't know, I just…I realized I really want to be somebody's Mom…I was with babies all day…I got to hold this one…for quite a while…and hour or so…and it just felt so…right to me…I loved it." She'd been one of the only women at the shower who didn't have her own baby. "And then I kept thinking about how maybe ours might have your smile…" She gave a sweet, reflective laugh. She loved his smile even though she wasn't too crazy about him at the moment and hoped that he felt the same about her. "And I just can't believe you don't want to make a baby with me, when I want to make one with you so much and it could be so nice to have a family."

"We do have a family: you and me…and Howard."

"That's not a family Bob, we're a couple and a lovable third wheel…and your treating it as though our child would be a third wheel…that's ridiculous Bob. A baby would be an expression of our love."

"Emily, I really think we should talk some more about this."

"What's there to talk about?" She asked.

"Well…I don't want to see you hurt…or unfulfilled…we may not want the same things…but I still love you and that's important."

"I don't know how I can keep on loving someone whose willing to break my heart Bob…it's not like I'm saying give me every little thing I want in the word…I'm asking you to fulfill a need of mine: give me a baby."

"Fulfill your need and change our entire life!"

"How much would it really change?" She was skeptical.

"Well, everything will be about the baby. We'd have to move, our money would go to diapers and formula and all that junk instead of…"

"Junk!" Emily didn't think baby things were junk.

"Junk!" He reaffirmed what he'd said in the first place.

"It isn't junk!" She protested when they sat down to dinner. "Was it junk when you were a little baby and your parents bought those things for you?"

"N-no." He admitted.

"Well it's not junk today, is it Bob?" She challenged. He paused, knowing that this was a trick question.

"Emily…why do you want to do this?" He asked again, not satisfied with the first answer.

Emily paused this time. She would've gotten up from the dinner table and left again, if she weren't starving. Little did she know, he was in the exact same predicament, and was being held hostage at the table by a roast and some potatoes, a feast he was too proud of, as a chef, to leave behind.

"I've given you my reasons Bob. I want to be a Mom, and I want a child with your smile." She hoped this would make him feel guilty. "Now where are yours." He froze he couldn't say anything."

"Where are they Bob? I'm waiting!"

"I-if I wanted one." He paused. "I-I'd insist that it had y-your eyes."

….

"Hi honey." Emily smiled, coming in the front door.

Several months had passed and Bob and Emily had made up. They were back to being happy together and had gradually stopped talking about the baby thing. Emily realized she'd likely never get Bob to change his mind and that she couldn't raise a child with someone who didn't want to. Being a Mother wasn't everything, even though it met a lot to her. She knew it wouldn't be right to break up a marriage with a wonderful man, who she loved, over it. Instead, Emily decided to focus her energies on traveling and on work, where she'd just come from. She was shocked to find Bob home before she was, and hours before usual…he seemed nervous and she wondered what he had to say.

"Emily, uh…I have something to tell you."

"Oh, what honey?" She was surprised by how nervous he seemed about this . "Your doctor called…he uh…he called me by accident."

"And?!" She was scared about this for a moment. There was chicken pox going around her school. She hoped she hadn't contracted it or anything associated with it.

"Sweetheart, you're pregnant."

"What?" She laughed blithely, and blinked her eyes, slowly coming to a little smile. "You're kidding." She thought he was playing some kind of cruel joke but still managed to laugh at the idea anyway.

"No, no Emily, I'm not." He said very sincerely.

"Y-ya…you're not!" She exclaimed very seriously. "Oh my gosh! A baby!" She squealed, completely disregarding the feelings she knew he had on the issue. "Oh Bob! A…" She stopped suddenly and remembered the argument they'd had several months before that had hurt her so much.

"You know, this explains a lot…about why you look that way." He offered.

"What?!" She asked, she didn't think she'd gained any weight or anything.

"It's just that, and I've been thinking for several days now, you're glowing. You're beautiful." He said simply.

"Thank you Bob." She giggled flirtatiously, still wondering what he was going to say next. His change in attitude intrigued her.

"Here, I uh think we need to talk." He said, grabbing her arm gently and pulling her onto the couch next to him.

Here it came: separation talk…or worse.

"Bob I'm not going to have an abortion." She told him up front.

"Honey, I would never ask you to do that."

She smiled with relief.

"Actually what I was going to say was that I bought the new baby a present." He said, handing her a small package. She was stunned and she began to cry again. "Go ahead Emily, open it." She did as she was told.

"Oh Bob, it's beautiful." She said, hugging the baby pink and white striped receiving blanket tightly.

"It's what I thought we might bring our baby home from the hospital in."

"Oh Bob!" She cried, throwing her arms around him. "Does that mean you're having this baby with me?"

"Yes." He kissed her cheek. "Emily, I…"

"Why? What made you change your mind?"

"I love you." He smiled. "And I can't loose you because I'm selfish, or stupid."

She smiled.

"I love you too. That's why I let this go."

"I know that. And I'm so glad you cared about my feelings. Even if maybe I was wrong about them?"

"You were?" She smiled.

"Yeah. And besides, the role reversal took me by surprise." It was what had really changed his mind. That and he couldn't do anything about a baby that was already coming, other than just embrace it.

"Role reversal?"

"When the doctor called me and told me I was going to be a Dad…something in that moment, it just changed everything. I was so nervous I could barely talk after he said it, then I kept thinking about the little baby hands, and their feet." She smiled noting he got choked up when he said this. "And then I realized fully that you were having one, it wasn't just your idea anymore. And that maybe I was just more nervous about the prospect than anything else. And then wonderment took over. I started thinking about it…and you and it's amazing." He said. She smiled.

"Yeah it is, isn't it?"

"And then I decided I'm just going to try to embrace it the best I can. I'm still not thrilled about the idea but I guess its time."

"And you bought a pink blanket?"

"I'm uh…kind of hoping for a girl." He confessed.

"Um…I'd like that." She giggled.

"A-and I realized something."

"What?" She asked.

"E-either way, we're both getting something we want."

"What's that?"

"Baby blues."

"What honey?" She didn't know what he met by this.

"Blue eyes." He informed.

"Oh that's right." She smiled.

Genetically, there was no alternative to the fact that the baby, boy or girl, would have to inherit blue eyes from one of them since blue-eyed parents must have a blue-eyed child.

"Especially if he looks a little like you…a little like me. And he doesn't have your eyes, or my eyes….but our eyes Emily."

"That sounds beautiful." She said as he gazed into her eyes and took his hand. Everything, about arguing over having a child in the first place, was forgiven in that single instant.

"Just think of it." He offered. "The shape of yours, the color of mine, the intensity of yours…" He deeply loved the intensity of her eyes. It matched something about her soul that he adored beyond measure. She smiled and he leaned his forehead against hers, beginning to promise her something. "Emily my love, our baby is going to have the most perfect blue eyes you've ever seen."


End file.
